Thursday, July 21, 2005

Huffing paint is bad mmmm...k

You know you got a problem when Krylon is the source of your high and you show up at the hardware store looking like that.

How do you say it....shady basketball broker...

Buy Blue

Another review from the hilarious Bob Bannister over at Turntablelab. To put this into context this is a review of a new record by David Banner called "Play" with the gutter of all gutter lyrics....

Jeeeeeeesus. That shit sounds like a deranged Mexican running a syrup soaked squeegee over a random tone generator. The little horror movie stabs every 8 bars and the fist in the air drum hit crescendo completely detonate shit. And the fucking foghorn on the chorus? Your man Banner just came with it. Not a great time to be the Ying Yang Twins. You just got beaten at your own fucking game. That's right, you'd better hop on a remix of this shit. Lyrics in here are the kind of shit trailer living older brothers play for their age 7 sisters who only understand subconsciously and end up being the most fucked up kinky 13 year olds in the world. There's some shit in here I really don't want to think about when I see grizzly bear driving a Mack truck lookin ass David Banner. The best part is when dude says “Go on, get your girl Sheryl.” That shit is fucking beautiful. It's really a shame this song is so raunchy, because the radio version is basically a mute button finger exercise regimen. And if “Wait” is any indication, I can't really see it blowing up the club, at least up north. But fuck if that is not one of the hottest beats all year. I wish David Banner would have been on this season's Real World. They managed to find the most generic black dude ever. What's his name? Naima or some shit? Fuck all that. I'd love to see big ass Banner coming through on some nose tackle shit all over those bitches with “Play” on constant repeat. Then again, that pretty boy might not have taken it so hard in the skull piece. So I guess, like life, it's all a give and take. Includes instrumental. –Bob Bannister


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