Friday, July 29, 2005

Hungry Hungry Hippos

Now I know why people live in the suburbs...

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Who you calling a sissy?

Much love and thanks to all those that came out last night to D'Vine to support. There were a few snags and kinks that had to be worked out, but all in all dope. The live art was especially fresh on canvases pulled out of a dumpster no less! Now that's hip hop...

Perhaps the strangest thing all night was the Turntable Bandit for which I have nicknamed. All night this guy was hovering over the DJ booth and even came in with a crate of records!? At first, I thought he was the DJ that got fired and nobody gave him the memo. Dude was just trainspotting the records being played and kept getting closer and closer even jumping in the booth. After a while he cooled out and sat with his pissed off "why do I date this guy" girlfriend.

All is going well trading off sets every so often...Rob, Mass Transit, some girl I don't know. Next thing I know TB has headphones wrapped around his neck ready to plug in. Rob gets out of the booth and dude jumps in, inserts headphone plug and starts to flip the turntables around old school style. Before anybody realized what the fuck was going on, he was dropping some house record. The girl who was getting on had enough sass to tell him it was her turn and promptly booted him off the decks.

Fast forward an hour later TB is still doing the same shit ready to pounce like my mom's cat to an unsuspecting bird. Finally I had to confront the guy and tell him what was up. He kept saying "open tables" and how he dropped off his demo earlier. Sorry dude there not open.

Call me crazy but this just blows my mind. Why would someone roll into a club and try and hijack the tables when nobody wants you there in the first place?

*much apologies for a stupid and meaningless story but I just had some shit on my mind

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Hot Shit

Tonights da night!!! No Cover!!!

So begins the Wednesday weekly at D'Vine located at 1950 W. North Ave across from Filter and next to Blue Fin Sushi.

Live art by Angel and Smut


Willis Wonka (ya boy)
Murray the Magnificient (Analog Addicts)
LyricIL (Organize Records)
plus special guests

Please come out a support. They have great food and a bangin sound system.

Boomin granny

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Far out man

Hammering out details to DJ Wednesday nights at D'Vine on North Ave....more info to come....stay tuned

So this is what $87 billion looks like

Friday, July 22, 2005

Say Cheese

How very appropriate.....

Another Scion brainwashing last night at Sonotheque. Thankfully no line and not very crowded at all. Missed Lord Finesse but caught Ricky Powell's slideshow of his photography, at least the narration. Dude looks pretty bad sadly enough. Still a wisecracking OG New Yorker but he's been helping himself to 2nd's and 3rd's at the dinner table (breakfast and lunch as well). His banter with the audience and constant reference to them as jerkoffs didn't go over so well. The slide show was prematurely aborted following the insistent booing and request for music.

Rob Swift stepped up to the plate and hit a dinger (I know, I know cheesy baseball reference). He ran through his typical DMC battle routine cuttin, scratchin and juggling. Getting his turntablist nerd out of the way he worked the crowd over with a barrage of breaks and classic funk sampled in essential hip hop tracks. With the night coming to an end and enough booze in people, the crowd finally cut loose, turning Sonotheque into basement Y Party circa 1992. Perhaps the most impressive aspect was he did everything sans vinyl relying on the program Finalscratch. Couldn't even tell the difference.

Anybody want to bumrush the gates at Lollapolloza? Hit me up!!!

Blue-haired brigade

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Huffing paint is bad mmmm...k

You know you got a problem when Krylon is the source of your high and you show up at the hardware store looking like that.

How do you say it....shady basketball broker...

Buy Blue

Another review from the hilarious Bob Bannister over at Turntablelab. To put this into context this is a review of a new record by David Banner called "Play" with the gutter of all gutter lyrics....

Jeeeeeeesus. That shit sounds like a deranged Mexican running a syrup soaked squeegee over a random tone generator. The little horror movie stabs every 8 bars and the fist in the air drum hit crescendo completely detonate shit. And the fucking foghorn on the chorus? Your man Banner just came with it. Not a great time to be the Ying Yang Twins. You just got beaten at your own fucking game. That's right, you'd better hop on a remix of this shit. Lyrics in here are the kind of shit trailer living older brothers play for their age 7 sisters who only understand subconsciously and end up being the most fucked up kinky 13 year olds in the world. There's some shit in here I really don't want to think about when I see grizzly bear driving a Mack truck lookin ass David Banner. The best part is when dude says “Go on, get your girl Sheryl.” That shit is fucking beautiful. It's really a shame this song is so raunchy, because the radio version is basically a mute button finger exercise regimen. And if “Wait” is any indication, I can't really see it blowing up the club, at least up north. But fuck if that is not one of the hottest beats all year. I wish David Banner would have been on this season's Real World. They managed to find the most generic black dude ever. What's his name? Naima or some shit? Fuck all that. I'd love to see big ass Banner coming through on some nose tackle shit all over those bitches with “Play” on constant repeat. Then again, that pretty boy might not have taken it so hard in the skull piece. So I guess, like life, it's all a give and take. Includes instrumental. –Bob Bannister

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Blue State Hustla

Taken from Craigslist.........."Dear Red States..." A Letter From The Blue!

Dear Red States...

We've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon,Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast.

We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay.

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once.

If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.

With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.

We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you. Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy b*****ds believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

By the way, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Peace out,

Blue States

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Asi Asi

Radio show tonight with your boy Ramsey Judon and LyricIL. Sadly I must take the night off but they will bring the heat!!!!!

Monday, July 18, 2005

Fresh Ta Def Boy

Friday, July 15, 2005

Perhaps the Greastest Record Review Ever!!!

I'm still buckled over from laughter.......

Taken from Turntablelab for the Nice and Smooth "Sometimes I Rhyme Slow" 12 inch

This shit sounds like the 90210 Hawaii beach getaway vacation special theme song. It's that fucking Tracy Chapman sample. Along with Brand Nubian over Edie Brickell, it reminds me of when VH1 was actually for old white women or maybe when old white women actually listened to Phil Collins and Peter Gabriel, not Green Day and Eminem. Fucking postmodern music homogenization leaves no room for the recontextualizers. Nothing's shocking, word to the Dave Navarro and Carmen Electra “hermaphrodites in reverse” E! Entertainment daily subtext. Leaving all that aside, this is the most heartwarming song ever written that includes the incredible pregnant pause of: “maybe I should lick her with my 9 millime...ter.” Damn, all of a sudden I just want to sit on the couch with caramel popcorn and have a wet dog lick my feet. Thanks Nice and Smooth. –Bob Bannister

Fuck I'm tired.......................

Really weird yet intriguing website about peoples secrets sent anonymously via postcard...

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Thinking Man's Mug Shot

First sign of the apocalypse.

I would like to take this opportunity to say congratulations to Nate Trenholm for making his network debut on Jimmey Kimmel Live last night. Not only that, Nate had his first word bleeped out by the censors. Who knew you couldn't say "homo" on TV?

McBrown Line?

Wednesday, July 13, 2005


Shock G retires from hip hop...............why Humpty why?????

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Radio Show Tonight 8-10 PM

Catch yours truly Willis Wonka with host Ramsey Judson tonight on UIC Radio. Streaming audio for everybody!!!!

Ronnie Woo Woo Missing?

Have you seen this man?
Seems Ronnie Woo Woo gave his wife the slip on June 29th.
This is really funny because I was actually going to make a post about my sighting of him on the Fourth of July in Evanston at the parade but was unable to get pics up then. Sadly I did not take the above pic but attained it from his personal site.
I swear to god this guy is everywhere.

Monday, July 11, 2005

Like whooooaaa

Why am I not surprised

Pied piper of hipster fashion up shits
creek with a turd for a paddle

I met one of the managers of the Wicker Park American Apparel one time and asked whats really going on with the place. I guess I was curious because they have been sprouting up in hip neighborhoods everywhere like Starbucks coffee shops. He explained that their expansion has gotten out of control and that the company, despite how "cool" they were was heading straight for the shitter. He seemed to know what was really going. The owner, Dov Charney was already dealing with mounting sexual harrassment issues. So it really was no surprise to see this today.

Interesting article about the infamous Steve Bartman

Free slurpees!!!!!!!!!!!! Today only helllll yes........

Scumfest was downright...well , errr...scummy. Never have I DJ'd that drunk but people were loving it. Two words: Scum Fest

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Whats wrong with this world

Congrats to my sister for getting a new job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Lake and Skyline Give Me a Warm Embrace

Pics of the rooftop....
as soon as I fix the bug thats not letting me upload pictures...any suggestions would be much appreciated.

Much love to The Stencil for linking me on their page. Listened to a sample of Caps and Jones' mix "Moving in Stereo" and it's got everything you need...tight mixing, genres across the board, and enough time span between tracks to keep a 11 year old with ADD ears open.

So "The Andy Milonakis Show" has been playing on a constant loop as of late on MTV. I couldn't help but become transfixed by a crazy 12 year old and his twisted/weird sense of humor. Well that is until a friend brought up the possibility that he isn't 12 but in fact a grown ass man. Turns out he's got that Gary Coleman/Webster disease and is in fact 29!!! We have all been duped...

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

I'm no freedom hater much more of celebrator

The Peoples Champ

--Nobody can fuck with Kobayashi!!!!

--What an incredibly long weekend that I'm attempting to recover from as you read this.

--Pics of the crew kicking it on the roof of my sisters building coming soon. Incredible views of the skyline and the festivities that ensued.

--*** NEW NIGHT FOR RADIO SHOW*** Catch Incisive Live with host Ramsey Judson and DJ Willis Wonka tonight and every Tuesday from 8-10 PM on UIC Radio...bringing the best in hip hop and funky bidness

--This is good